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Smokin Tunes A place for musicians and music lovers (that also smoke cigars!) to discuss their passion.

 
 
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Old 05-09-2002, 03:19 PM   #1
jefslat
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1. Which of the following best describes your background in music?

I once blew across the top of an empty bottle to make a whistling sound.
I played bongo drums in my sixth grade band class.
My mom made me listen to an Elvis Presley album when I was a kid.
My uncle used to play the accordion.
I've always wanted to be a rock star - does that count?

2. If you play a musical instrument, would you be willing to give it up to be in the group?

Yes.
No.

3. How would you describe your singing?

Less irritating than the sound of fingernails scraping on a blackboard.
Less irritating than Roseanne singing "The Star Spangled Banner."
More pleasant than a barium enema.

4. Are you familiar with any of the following dance moves?

Pelvic thrust.
Heart clutch.
Butt shake.
Crotch grab.

5. How many hours per day do you spend fixing your hair?

5 minutes.
2 hours.
4 hours.
I never stop fixing my hair.

6. What is your favorite type of hair product?

Shampoo.
Conditioner.
Gel.
Mousse.
All of the above

7. At least one member must have a goofy haircut. Are you willing to be that boy?

Yes.
No.
As long as I'm not also the younger boy who doesn't get to sing a solo until the third CD.

8. Would you be willing to be the younger boy who doesn't get to sing a solo until the third CD?

Yes.
No.
As long as I'm not also the boy with the goofy hair.

9. Are you be willing to be manufactured, molded, exposed and humiliated by a bunch of big shot producers on TV?

Yes.
No.
As long as I'm not the boy with the goofy hair.

10. Do you mind if every other boy on the planet thinks you're a total fruitbat?

Yes.
No.
Maybe.
As long as I'm not the boy with the goofy hair who doesn't get to sing a solo until the third CD.

11. Can you sing to a chubby girl on stage without laughing in her face?

Yes.
No.
Only if I'm the boy with the goofy hair.

12. Can you fill any of following essential roles in the group?

Buff boy.
Buns o' steel boy.
Square chin boy.
Shy boy.
Sensitive skin boy.
Ambiguously gay boy.
Pissed off bad boy who never smiles and brings publicity to the group by getting arrested for drunk driving.

13. Two identical conducting spheres carry charges of +3 coulombs and -1 coulomb, respectively. If the spheres are brought into contact and separated, the final charge will be:

-2 C.
+1 C.
+2 C.
-1 C.
I don't know, but I look great in cargo pants.

14. What is your real reason for wanting to join a boy band?

Money.
Chicks.
Prospect of a spin-off acting career.
Chicks and money.
I love the music - I mean, chicks.

"Well, there was me, that is, Alex, and my three droogs, that is Pete, Georgie and Dim, and we were sitting in the Korova Milk Bar trying to make up our razoodocks about what to do with the evening."
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