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Old 05-11-2002, 05:18 PM   #1
Lang Daddy
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You know the one. When your outside someplace enjoying a tasty stick and maybe a hundred yards away (or even further)some people are walking by. One of the jerks from the group starts to generate this lame excuse for a cough (totally exaggerated and fake). And then says "oh look there he is. He's the one smoking the cigar. I hate cigars...cah, cah, cah". Making it a point so you can hear their complaints and their lame ass cough!

This happened to me while I was fishing today (two or three times). I made it a point to stay away from all the granola heads so I could enjoy a smoke while fishing. But leave it to some jerk to bitch. I guess you had to be there to know how far away these people were and that I HIGHLY doubt my creamy delicous smoke really made them cough.

Just wanted to bitch a little myself. I feel much better now, thanks.
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Old 05-11-2002, 05:38 PM   #2
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I recommend sticking the lit end of your cigar in their eye. See if they bitch about the smoke then.

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Old 05-11-2002, 06:13 PM   #3
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Ahhhh...the "cough" .. I know it well, my friend. <--- for all the "coughers"
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Old 05-11-2002, 06:58 PM   #4
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I get people bitching as I am lighting it up. It really amazes me when I am in a dance club and there is so much cigarette smoke that you can't even breathe, but the minute you light up a cigar they make stupid faces. Mostly the women who are chain smoking that complain the most.
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Old 05-11-2002, 07:08 PM   #5
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I curse em a blue streak, make my face and neck get red on purpose and get in their face and say " I,m psychotic and my shrink is in the process of switching my medication, I REALLY think you should leave the area NOW !
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Old 05-11-2002, 07:18 PM   #6
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Heres another good one..I,m on a train through the south of Spain for 6 days on my honeymoon 2 years ago. There are 60 people on this " orient express " of Spain and 26 are Americans. Now, we are in the second largest Habanos country in the world, along with a french couple that have cigarettes hanging out of their mouths 19 hrs. a day( they sleep 5 ). Most of the French and Spaniards are smoking and of course I have my cigars; 2 cabins down in our car are 4 Californians from LA in their 50s and SAME SHIT; there are NO smoking prohibitions on the train and ashtrays everywhere including in the cabins. What went on with these 4 prima donnas the first 2 days was almost comical, up to and including rude commentary and EVEN holding noses..ALL this in Europe where they smoke like fiends. We finally got them to avoid us the balance of the trip but I was NOT gonna back down and not enjoy my smokes in Spain..in the bar car, in our cabin and on any number of the terrific guided tours at every stop. They just stayed well away from us the last 4 days and my wife and I had a really enjoyable time !
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Old 05-11-2002, 07:29 PM   #7
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Try this tactic which I learned in Australia...

"Sorry. But have you devoted your entire life to becoming a total dickhead, or is it a genetic defect caused by bad breeding within your immediate family? Have a nice day by the way."

"Don't take yourself or life too seriously. You ain't getting off this planet alive!" - My grandfather
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Old 05-11-2002, 07:53 PM   #8
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Since I am a mild mannered person, If I hear that cough, I just meander my way closer to the person. This way, I will be assisting them to learn how to "cough the cough".
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Old 05-11-2002, 08:07 PM   #9
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If you're fishing, youre outdoos, so FUCK them. Anyone outside who complains about even cigarette smoke needs to grow a motherfucking life.

That, uh, wasn't too strong, was it?

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Old 05-11-2002, 08:12 PM   #10
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Next time tell them...

"Oh, I'm sorry. Is my cigar bothering you. Sorry, but I was recently diagnosed with a terminal illness. My doctor said I only have a week to live, so I wanted to live a little and try new things. I'll put it out if it's bothering you, though."

Heck man, they might even buy you a box of cigars!

Just kidding. You shouldn't oughta do it!

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Edited by - Herfules on 05/12/2002 09:51:01 AM
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